Episode 7

Relax, Reset, Repeat: When Life Gets Loud, Breathe

Feeling overwhelmed? You’re not alone. In this episode of Pause Here, we unpack the magic of the Relax breathing pattern. It’s more than just a deep breath; it’s a powerful tool to reset your nervous system, soothe your mind, and help you regain control when life feels chaotic.

From military pilots flying through storms to scuba divers keeping calm beneath the waves – even to you in line at the grocery store – this breathing pattern is being used by people everywhere to stay grounded and focused. Breathe in. Breathe out. Tune in and discover your new secret superpower.

Below, you’ll find a comprehensive bibliography of all the sources we utilized in this episode.

Transcript
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Please pause here.

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Welcome back to Pause Here, where we delve into the art and science of breathing to improve our daily lives.

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I'm your host, Sarah, here to guide you through the science and simplicity of breathing, meditation, and relaxation techniques that can transform your day, your health, and even your sleep.

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Today, we're exploring a simple yet powerful technique that can change how you breathe, how you feel, and even how you think, introducing the Relax Breathing Pattern.

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Have you ever noticed how your breath changes when you're stressed?

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It becomes shallow, rapid, sometimes even feels out of control.

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But what if I told you that a simple change in how you breathe could reset your mind and body, reduce your stress, and bring you a sense of calm?

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This technique is called the 6-4 breathing pattern, and it's as simple as it sounds.

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You inhale gently for 4 seconds, and exhale slowly for 6.

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Just 4 counts in, and 6 counts out.

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This small shift has a profound impact on your body.

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This breathing pattern is a scientifically proven tool used in some of the world's most high pressure professions.

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Military pilots use it to maintain focus in the cockpit, athletes use it to stay steady before the big game.

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Even doctors use it with patients recovering from serious conditions, helping them find their breath, quite literally.

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So today we are going to dive into this simple breathing technique.

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You are going to learn how it works and why it is so powerful, how it is being used in real world settings, and most importantly, how you can use this simple technique to bring more rest and relaxation into your own life.

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But before we dive into the science and the stories, I want to give you a moment, a little preview, right here, right now.

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Let's try this together.

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Close your eyes or soften your gaze.

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Gently inhale through your nose for four.

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And slowly exhale for six.

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Inhale, two, three, four.

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Exhale, two, three, four, five, six.

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Feel the difference?

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That's your body shifting gears, slowing down and calming down.

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In this episode, you're not just going to learn about the four-six breathing pattern.

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You're going to understand it, feel it, and discover how it can become your own personal pause button whenever you need it.

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So take a deep breath and let's begin.

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So, what exactly is the relaxed breathing pattern?

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On the surface, it seems so simple.

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Inhale for 4 seconds, and exhale for 6.

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But, like many simple things, it holds a quiet power, and to understand it fully, we need to look at what it is, how it works, and where it comes from.

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Let's begin with the basics.

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The relaxed breathing pattern, also known as the 4-6 breathing pattern, is a form of paced breathing.

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It's a technique where you intentionally slow your breath, inhaling gently for 4 seconds, and then letting that breath flow out slowly for 6 seconds.

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But why these specific numbers?

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Why 4 and 6?

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The answer lies in the way your body's nervous system works.

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When you lengthen your exhale, something incredible happens.

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Your body begins to shift.

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You move from the fight or flight mode of your sympathetic nervous system to the rest and digest mode of your parasympathetic nervous system.

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This is your body's calm center.

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And the real magic of this breathing pattern is in the exhale.

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That slow, steady, six count release.

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It's this longer exhale that triggers your vagus nerve, a powerful nerve that runs from your brain, down through your chest and into your gut.

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When the vagus nerve is activated, your heart rate slows, your stress hormones drop and your body feels safe.

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This is not anything new.

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In truth, it's quite ancient.

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Cultures around the world have known of the power of slow, rhythmic breathing for centuries.

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In ancient India, the practice of Pranayama, the art of breath control, has been a core part of yoga for thousands of years.

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Techniques like alternate nostril breathing or victorious breathing use controlled inhales and longer exhales calming the mind and nourishing the body.

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In China, the practice of qigong used slow measured breathing to harmonize the body's energy, balancing the mind and improving the health.

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And even in the Zen traditions of Japan, monks use a practice called zazen where the focus is on slow steady breathing bringing peace to the mind.

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However, what was once mystical and spiritual is now backed by solid science.

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In recent decades, researchers have studied what actually happens in your body when you breathe this way.

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Studies have shown that the 4-6 breathing pattern can significantly reduce stress, lowering levels of cortisol, your body's main stress hormone.

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It improves heart rate variability, a key measure of your body's ability to adapt to stress, and a higher heart rate variability means greater resilience.

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In some studies, it's even shown to enhance cognitive performance, improving your focus, clarity and decision making.

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But how does it compare to other breathing techniques?

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Why not just use deep breathing or rapid breathing?

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Well, here's the difference.

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Deep breathing fills your lungs fully, but without control, it can actually increase anxiety if you over-breathe.

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And rapid breathing or hyperventilation can trigger your sympathetic nervous system, increasing your stress.

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But the 4-6 breathing pattern, with its gentle, steady inhale followed by a slow relaxing exhale, makes it unique.

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It calms without overwhelming.

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But there's another layer to this pattern.

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It's versatility.

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You can use it in almost any situation.

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To prepare your mind for a big task, to calm yourself during a difficult conversation, to ease yourself into sleep at night, or even to reset your focus during a busy work day.

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It's like a portable sanctuary, a relaxation retreat you can carry in your own lungs.

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Science and Serenity.

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Two words that often seem worlds apart, but when it comes to breathwork, they are beautifully intertwined.

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Understanding how our breath can influence our mind and body has been an expanding area of research in the fields of neuroscience, psychology, and medicine.

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And making sense of this research requires being familiar with a few key concepts, so let's go over them.

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Starting with your body's two primary states.

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We mentioned these a bit earlier, but we'll go over them a bit more in depth now.

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You have your fight or flight and rest and digest.

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These are controlled by two branches of your nervous system.

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The sympathetic nervous system, your body's fight or flight mode, is what's activated when you're stressed, anxious, or in danger.

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Your heart rate increases, your breathing becomes rapid, and your muscles tense up.

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On the other hand, you have the parasympathetic nervous system, your body's rest and digest mode.

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This is where you feel calm, relaxed, and safe.

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Your heart rate slows, your muscles soften, and your mind clears.

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But here's what's remarkable.

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Of all the automatic functions your nervous system controls, like your heartbeat, digestion, and mood, there's one you can manually override.

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Your breath.

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By consciously changing the way you breathe, you can guide your mind and body into a more relaxed state.

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And this is the power of breathwork like the relaxed breathing pattern, and the science behind it is nothing short of fascinating.

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When you use the relaxed breathing pattern, inhaling for four counts and exhaling for six, you're not just filling your lungs with air, you're also sending a message to your nervous system.

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That longer exhale is like a whisper, telling your body it's okay, you're safe.

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The secret source lies in something called the vagal tone.

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This is a measure of how active your vagus nerve is, one of the most important nerves in your body.

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Think of it as the main highway between your parasympathetic nervous system, connecting your brain to your heart, lungs and digestive system.

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When you exhale slowly, you're activating the vagus nerve.

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This triggers something known as the vagal response, which calms your heart rate, reduces anxiety, and even lowers your level of cortisol, the body's main stress hormone.

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Research has shown that people with a higher vagal tone have a more positive mood, better emotional regulation and a greater resilience to stress.

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In fact, in some extreme cases, doctors have even used electrical devices to stimulate the vagus nerve in patients suffering from severe depression, a treatment known as vagus nerve stimulation.

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And it works because the vagus nerve is so deeply connected to how we feel.

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But you don't need surgery to activate your vagus nerve.

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You can do it with something as simple as your breath.

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Studies have shown that slow, controlled breathing, including the 4-6 pattern, can naturally increase your vagal tone, improving your mood, reducing anxiety, and even enhancing your focus.

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In a review of 119 studies, the European Respiratory Society concluded that slow, controlled breathing is the most effective way to increase vagal tone, creating a balance between the body's fight or flight and rest and digest systems.

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But what exactly is happening inside your body when you practice the relaxed breathing pattern?

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Let's break it down a bit.

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As you inhale for four counts, your heart rate slightly increases.

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This is called respiratory sinus arrhythmia.

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When you exhale for six seconds, your heart rate decreases and your vagus nerve is activated.

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Over time, this creates a state known as cardiac coherence, a harmonious relationship between your heart rate and your breathing, creating a deep sense of calm and balance.

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But wait, there's more.

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This breathing pattern doesn't just calm your nerves.

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It can also boost your focus.

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In a recent study, participants who practiced 4-6 breathing showed significant improvements in focus and cognitive performance.

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Their minds were sharper, and their decision making was clearer, even under pressure.

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This is because relaxed breathing balances your sympathetic and parasympathetic system.

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You're not just calm, you're calm and alert, and this is the true magic of the technique.

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But why does the 6-4 pattern work so well?

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Well, most of us breathe quickly, around 12-20 breaths per minute.

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But the relaxed breathing pattern brings this down to around 6 breaths per minute, the perfect range for optimal oxygenation, balanced vagal tone, and a relaxed yet alert mind.

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It's this equilibrium that lets you feel both relaxed and alert at the same time.

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It doesn't turn off your stress response entirely.

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Instead, it helps you achieve what scientists call optimal sympathovegal balance.

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Imagine you're walking on a tightrope.

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Too much stress and you fall one way, too much relaxation and you fall the other.

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But the 4-6 breathing pattern keeps you moving forward along the tightrope, steady, calm, and focused.

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And the best part?

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This isn't just a theory, it's something you can use in your everyday life, in moments of stress, before big decisions, or even to unwind at the end of the day.

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The relaxed breathing pattern is more than just a calming technique, it's a lifeline.

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And it's not just used by those seeking peace on a quiet afternoon, it's used by people standing on the edge of chaos, facing some of the most high-pressure situations.

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Let me take you to one of those places.

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Thunder rumbles in the distance.

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Inside the cockpit of a military helicopter, the pilot grips the controls.

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The radar is flickering in and out.

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The wind is fierce.

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They train for this, but their heart is racing.

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In their earpiece, a calm voice reminds them to breathe.

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The pilot's hands are steady, but their mind feels like a storm.

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The rain lashes against the windshield, but the pilot's mind is clear.

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With each breath, they feel their focus returning.

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Their heart rate slows.

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Their grip on the controls is firm, but calm.

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They navigate through the storm, steady, composed.

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In military flight training, extended exhale breathing is a core tool for pilots.

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It helps them maintain focus and avoid panic, even in intense situations.

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Next, we find ourselves in a stadium filled with the roar of thousands.

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The clock is ticking down, just ten seconds left, and you're standing at the free-through line, basketball in hand.

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Your team is down by one point, and you have two shots, two chances.

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You start to feel the weight of it all, the pressure, the expectations, but you've trained for this, and your coach's voice echoes in your mind.

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When you're here, use your breath.

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You gently bounce the ball, and close your eyes for a brief second.

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Inhale, and release it slowly.

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The noise fades, the pressure melts.

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You open your eyes, and take the shot.

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Swish, the crowd whirs wild.

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In sport psychology, breathing techniques like the Relax Pattern are used by elite athletes to maintain focus, manage pre-competition anxiety, and recover quickly after intense moments.

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We find ourselves 20 meters below the surface.

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The ocean is a world of silence and shadows.

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You're an experienced diver, but today the current is stronger than you expected.

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Your mask is fogging, and your heart starts pounding.

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Panic is a diver's worst enemy, but you know how to fight it.

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You pause, and begin breathing, slowly in, and then out.

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Big breath in, two, three, four, and out, two, three, four, five, six.

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Your mind clears, your breathing slows, you look around.

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The underwater world is beautiful, tranquil, and now so are you.

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In scuba training and underwater rescue, breathwork is a core skill for preventing panic and maintaining oxygen efficiency.

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The relaxed breathing pattern is an anchor in chaos, a tool for calm in the most intense situations.

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But you don't have to be a pilot navigating the storm, a doctor in the ER, or a diver exploring the uncharted depths of the ocean to benefit from it.

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In fact, some of its greatest power is found in the most ordinary moments of life.

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You're running late again.

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Your alarm didn't go off.

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You spilled your coffee.

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Now you're watching as the bus you've just missed drives off into the distance.

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Standing at the bus stop, frustration starts bubbling up.

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Your hands clench.

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Your breathing quickens.

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But then you remember, you've got a tool for this.

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You close your eyes for a moment, letting the noise of the city fade into the background.

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In for four, and out for six, and one more time.

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And with each breath, your frustration fades.

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Your mind clears.

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It's just a bus.

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It's not the end of the world.

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You check your phone, order a ride chair, and walk calmly to the curb.

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So, the relaxed breathing pattern isn't just for emergencies.

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It's your everyday stresses, the little frustrations that can build up if we let them.

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Maybe you're standing in a conference room, a stack of notes in your hand.

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The team is gathered around the table, and your boss is staring at you with that look.

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You know the one that makes your heart race.

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You were ready.

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You knew this material, but suddenly, your mind goes completely blank.

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Your palms are sweating, your voice feels tight, but you have a secret weapon.

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You gently lower your notes and take a slow, quiet breath.

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And out for six.

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No one notices, but in that brief moment, your mind clears and your heart rate slows.

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You pick up your notes again and begin your presentation.

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Calm, clear, confident.

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The relaxed breathing pattern is a great quick tool to help out in those moments when your nerves get the best of you.

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Maybe you're lying in bed, staring at the ceiling.

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It's almost midnight and your mind is racing.

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Did you remember to send that email?

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What about tomorrow's meeting?

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Did you lock the door?

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Is the stove still on?

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Your thoughts are a whirlwind, pulling you further from sleep.

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But then you remember your breath.

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You settle in to a comfortable position, maybe on your back or on your side.

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You close your eyes and begin.

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Inhale, two, three, four, exhale, two, three, four, five.

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You don't force your thoughts away, just let them come and go like waves.

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But your breath is steady.

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Slowly, your mind quiets.

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Your body softens, and soon, you're asleep.

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Sometimes focusing on your breath can help quiet the battles within your own restless mind.

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Maybe you're standing in line at the grocery store, but the line is long and your basket is heavy.

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Your phone is buzzing in your pocket, messages from work, family, friends.

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A child is crying two rows over, and the cashier is moving so slow, it feels like time is moving backwards.

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Your patience is wearing thin.

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But then you pause and smile to yourself.

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Remember, you have a secret tool.

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Standing there in the line, you close your eyes for just a moment, in for four, and out for six.

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Your mind is slightly relaxed, and while the noise doesn't go away, it doesn't bother you as much.

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Relaxed breathing isn't just for big moments, it's also for the small ones, the everyday irritations that can really wear us down.

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So as you can see, the relaxed breathing pattern can be used in a variety of situations, from the cockpit of a plane, to the emergency room, or the high-pressure world of elite sports, to stressful work presentations, sleepless nights, or hey, even try it out at your next family dinner.

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It's a tool you can use anytime, anywhere, whether you're feeling overwhelmed, frustrated, anxious, or just need a moment of pause.

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The beauty of the relaxed breathing pattern lies in its flexibility.

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You don't need special equipment, you don't need a quiet room or a lot of time, you just need your breath.

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So let me give you some tips on how you can use it, wherever you are, and whatever you're doing.

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Make it part of your morning ritual.

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Mornings can be a chaotic time, rushing to get ready, checking your phone, planning your day, writing that exhaustive to-do list.

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But imagine starting your day with a moment of relaxation, to set the tone for a more peaceful day.

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As soon as you wake up, before you reach for your phone, sit up in bed, close your eyes, place one hand on your chest and the other on your belly, and gently begin your 6-4 breathing.

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Inhale, and exhale.

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Do this for just a few minutes, a small, relaxing pause before your day begins.

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If you want, you can even turn this into a mini morning meditation and repeat a calming phrase or mantra with each breath, like, I am strong on the inhale, and I am ready on the exhale.

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Work can often be a major source of stress, back-to-back meetings, endless emails, deadlines looming, but the relaxed breathing pattern can be your secret reset button.

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Set a reminder on your phone or your computer, something gentle like, time to take a breath, and when it goes off, take a short break, sit back, close your eyes, and begin your relaxed breathing.

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Just a minute can be enough.

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If you're in a meeting or in a place where you can't close your eyes, that's okay.

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You can still do it subtly.

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No one even has to know.

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This isn't just about de-stressing.

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It's about clearing your mind, refreshing your focus, and giving you another tool to help avoid burnout.

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Sometimes life is simply busy.

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Rushing through errands, getting stuck in traffic, waiting in long lines.

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These little moments can be surprisingly stressful, but they can also be opportunities.

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Stuck in traffic?

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Instead of letting your frustration build, try relaxed breathing.

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Waiting in line at the grocery store?

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Soften your gaze, let your shoulders relax, and breathe.

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Rushing around the house, trying to get everything done?

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Pause, take one slow steady breath, and then continue.

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The beauty of this technique is that you can use it anytime, anywhere.

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For as long or as short as you need, it's invisible but powerful.

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You can even take it with you outdoors, or as I like to call it, the walking breath.

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The relaxed pattern isn't just for still quiet moments, it can be a beautiful companion on a stroll.

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As you walk, you can sync your steps with your breath.

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Inhale for four steps, and exhale for six steps.

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Let the rhythm of your steps and your breath become one.

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This can turn a simple walk into a moving meditation, relaxing your mind and lifting your mood.

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Have you ever been in a difficult conversation, maybe a tense meeting, an argument, or just an awkward moment?

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That's the perfect time for a little 4-6 breathing.

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As the other person speaks, listen but focus gently in on your breath.

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Inhale gently for 4 seconds, letting their words pass over you.

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And exhale slowly for 6, allowing yourself to stay composed, even when the conversation is difficult.

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This doesn't just calm you down, it helps you stay clear, thoughtful, rational and kind, even in the tough moments.

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You can make it part of your nighttime routine.

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As we talked about last episode, good sleep doesn't just start when you close your eyes, it starts with how you prepare your mind and body.

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The relaxed breathing pattern is a perfect way to transition from the busyness of the day to the tranquility of the night.

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Before you go to bed, sit on your bed or lie down comfortably.

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Close your eyes, take a deep comfortable breath and begin your 4-6 breathing.

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Imagine that with each exhale you're letting go of the day, the worries, the stresses, the thoughts, the tension.

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Do this for just 5 minutes and you'll find yourself feeling drowsy, relaxed and ready for rest.

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If you struggle with sleep, you can even use this while you're lying in bed as a gentle way to help guide yourself into dreamland.

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And finally, one of my personal favourites is to create a kind of trigger.

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One of the best ways to build a habit is to connect it to something you already do.

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This is called habit stacking.

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Like every time you make a cup of tea or coffee, do some 4-6 breathing while you wait for it to brew.

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Maybe every time you wash your hands, take one slow deep breath.

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Or every time you get in your car, take a breath before you start the engine.

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Linking your breathwork to something you already do makes it more automatic and a part of your day.

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The relaxed breathing pattern is always with you.

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It's your portable pause button, your instant reset, your quiet anchor in a noisy world.

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And here we are again at the end of our journey together.

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Today, we've explored the relaxed breathing pattern, a technique that can quiet your mind, steady your heart, and bring you back to your center, wherever you are.

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As we close this episode, I hope that if one thing you take away is that your breath is your ally, it's your reset button, your anchor, your sanctuary.

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And all it takes is a moment, a little bit of awareness, and a gentle rhythm.

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Thanks for pausing here with me today.

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If you've enjoyed our time together, try out the Pausing Point app for more mindful rests.

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Why not share this episode with someone who could use a pause in their playlist?

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We're at Pausing Point to get updates and stay connected.

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Next time, on Pause Here, we're exploring something magical, the power of music and meditation.

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Did you know that certain music, like classical compositions, can actually enhance your focus, deepen your meditation, and even reduce stress?

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But it's not just about any music, it's about the science of sound, the rhythm of your mind, and the harmony between notes and neuron.

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Join me as we dive into how music can be more than just a background, it can be your guide, your inspiration, and your peaceful escape.

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So whether you're a lover of soothing strings or a fan of gentle piano notes, you won't want to miss this one.

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I can't wait to bring more peaceful pausing points and practical tips your way next time.

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As we close today's episode, if you have a few more minutes to stick around, I invite you to join me for a short, relaxed meditation.

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This is your time, a moment just for you.

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A chance to set aside any worries, to step away from the busyness of the day, and to simply breathe.

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Welcome to this moment of stillness.

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Wherever you are right now, let this be your space, a quiet place where you can simply be.

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If you're sitting, feel the weight of your body gently resting.

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If you're lying down, feel the support beneath you.

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Close your eyes if you like, or simply soften your gaze.

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Take a moment to let your shoulders relax, let your jaw soften, and gently bring your attention to your breath.

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Take a moment to simply notice your breath.

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There's no need to change it yet, just notice.

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Now, let's begin our relaxed breathing pattern.

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A gentle, steady technique that helps you release tension and find ease.

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I want you to take a deep, comfortable breath in through your nose, letting your belly gently rise.

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And then release it slowly through your mouth, letting go of any tightness.

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Inhale slowly through your nose.

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Exhale through your mouth.

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And exhale.

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With each breath, I want you to begin imagining yourself in a place of peace, a place where you feel completely at ease.

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Maybe you find yourself on a quiet beach, warm golden sand beneath you, the sound of gentle waves lapping at the shore, the sun's light dancing on the water.

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As you breathe in, you feel the fresh salty air filling your lungs.

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And as you breathe out, you let go of any tension, like a wave washing away footprints in the sand.

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Each breath you take fills with that fresh, earthy scent of pine and moss, and with each exhale, you let go of any stress, feeling rooted, steady, grounded.

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Maybe you're floating on a gentle lake.

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The water is still, like a mirror reflecting the open sky above.

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You feel weightless, supported, drifting without a care.

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The warm sunlight touches your face, and a soft breeze kisses your skin.

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As you breathe in, you take in a sense of light.

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And as you breathe out, you feel any tension dissolve, rippling away into the water.

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This place can be anywhere you choose.

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A quiet room with a cozy blanket.

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A mountain peak with a view stretching forever.

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A garden filled with the scent of blooming flowers.

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Wherever your mind takes you, let it be a place of rest, a place of peace.

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Let's continue for a few more breaths together.

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Feel the ease in your shoulders, the softness in your face, the gentle rhythm of your breath guiding you.

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And even though this place may be a creation of your mind, the peace you feel is very real.

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And it's a place you can return to at any time you need, a place within you.

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Let's take one more deep, gentle breath together.

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Inhaling, filling yourself with lightness.

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And exhaling, letting go completely.

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When you're ready, begin to bring your awareness back to the space you're in.

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Wiggle your fingers and your toes.

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Maybe stretch your arms and shrug your shoulders.

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Feel the surface beneath you.

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And whenever you're ready, gently open your eyes.

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Know that this sense of ease is always here for you, just one breath away.

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As we conclude today's meditation and this episode, carry this sense of rest and relaxation with you back into your day or night.

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And remember, this peaceful state is always accessible to you through your breath and a quiet moment of reflection.

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I'm Sarah and you've been listening to Pause Here.

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Until next time, sit back, breathe deep and relax.